LEADERSHIP-THE BOTTOM LINE
Monthly Leadership Session Follow-up!
Improving Communication & Setting and Reaching Goals!
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“Outstanding leaders understand that when you discover your mission, you’ll ‘feel’ its great demand and it will fill you with enthusiasm and with a burning desire to get to work on it and to get it accomplished.”
—W. Clement Stone
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Monday,
June 29, 2009
We would like to thank you once again for your participation in our monthly leadership development session during the month of June, 2009.
Communication
As you will remember, in our first segment we discussed the subject of ‘communication’, specifically the importance of us becoming more consciously aware of what the other person is ‘really’ saying to us, (verbally and non-verbally), through ‘listening’ well – so as to be able to ‘improve’ the overall communication process.
Example; When is the ‘best time’ to solve any problem . . . before, during or after it has occurred? Whether it involves our relationships or us working together in the many ways we do to insure the success of our work processes, how many of the issues that we deal with on a regular basis could be averted or resolved much more easily if better communication were the order of the day.
We agreed in our discussion that both people involved in the communication process have to assume 100% responsibility for the success of the ‘communication outcome’ – which includes both sending and receiving information:
Sending
1. Use clear language:
Make sure you have the other person’s attention and that you are using ‘terms’ that can be understood and ‘identified with’ by the other person. Make sure you understand their perspective and that you are taking that under consideration in your approach to communicating with them.
2. Use multiple forms of communication:
The more important the issue the more forms of communication one should employ to make sure that the best possible outcome is achieved for everyone involved. In addition to ‘verbal’, how many other forms of communication do you have available to you, and in which combination should they be used in what specific circumstances? (Try and say that 10 time real fast!)
3. Make sure the other person really understands:
So . . . how do you go about accomplishing that exactly?! By following your explanation or ’statements’ with some kind of an ‘open-ended’ question that will require a specific detailed response of some kind that will confirm to both of you that they did ‘really understand’ what you were communicating – and you both are on the ’same page’ with respect to what ‘good’ will look like as the result of your ’successful communication’ process.
What happens when we are ‘too busy’ to really communicate effectively and we just ASSUME the other person understands?
You’re right!
Receiving
1. Become a better listener:
That comes by way of making a conscious effort to get good at it! ‘Listening’ is truly one of the most valuable and really profitable things you can do! The really ’successful’ leaders, managers, sales people, spouses and friends have learned that people will always tell you exactly what you’ll need to know to succeed with them, if you’ll only stop, pay attention to them, ask the right questions and then what? _____________ That’s right!!
You can get really, really good at listening as the result of practicing the six ‘listening skills’ we reviewed in our session which are . . .
A. Use attentive body language (it really does help you listen!)
B. Use thinking speed constructively (pay attention – duh!)
C. Maintain silence, observe & process (closed mouth position!)
D. Avoid prejudices & preconceptions (known as small-mindedness!)
E. Avoid jumping to conclusions (wait on all the facts before deciding!)
F. Be an active listener (participate – it can actually be fun!)
2. Observe non-verbal communication:
In our April session we discuss the fact that communication can be broken into three important parts which are:
7% Words
38% Tone of Voice
55% Physical – Non-Verbal
Have you ever heard someone say that if you’re happy, you might want to ‘tell your face’? Or, have you ever had someone go ahead and give you the answer they ‘thought’ you ‘wanted’ to hear but you both knew their heart wasn’t really in it, because it was written all over their face, and even their body language gave them away . . . example, they were slumped over and frowning a little as they were giving you that answer they really didn’t even believe in, themselves. It pays to listen with your eyes, your ears, and most importantly, with your heart!
3. Make sure that you really understand:
This is very similar to #3 above. When you are on the receiving end, it’s still up to you to make sure you really do understand what they are trying to say – and you confirm it in much the same way you did under #3 up there – with another one of your famous questions . . .
“If I understand you correctly, what you’re really wanting me to do is ____________ , am I understanding you correctly?
If I’ve learned anything over the years when it comes to communication – especially under pressure – it’s that the problem with most communication is the illusion that it’s been effectively accomplished. Keep in mind that the quality of your communication will always be the results it achieves.
Hey you . . Listen up!!
Goals
In our second segment together, we discussed the importance of ‘goals’; again, not only our own but . . how to influence the attitudes of our people with respect to the importance of, and the incredible benefits of having meaningful goals in their lives. You want to see your people come to life with respect to their attitude and the quality of their overall performance?
How many of you remember that we said that a significant part of leadership involves ’selling’ which is really nothing more than helping people make ‘good decisions’ that really will be in their best interest?
Some of the most important and valuable decisions you can help your people make have everything to do with you helping them understand who they really are, and what’s really most important to them, and why.
From there you go to work on helping them to determine what they really want to accomplish in their life and career, and then you go to work on helping them turn ‘that’ or ‘those things’ into ‘clearly defined goals’ that they can begin to identify with, get really excited about, and involved in achieving over a period of time - with help and encouragement from you – their leader and mentor.
When you approach and live your own life that way, and you then turn around and get your people involved in approaching their lives and work in that way, life begins to take on a whole new meaning for everyone involved.
It really does . . . Everyone ultimately wins!
What I am describing here has a lot to do with what genuine leadership is really all about; especially when it comes to the concept of developing people while you’re working with them on a daily basis to get the job done well - on behalf of your customers or clients.
Trust me . . . people (human nature) needs a ‘valid reason’ to come to life and perform at or beyond their recognized capacity; and no matter how it shakes out, it will always come back to who you are and what’s really most important to you and why. Help your people wrap their minds around that, and you will have some truly motivated team members on your hands – then all you have to do is help them come to the ‘true realization’ that they’ll be able to achieve their goals by helping you achieve the company’s goals. Sounds like a match made in heaven, doesn’t it! Well it can be when the ‘right leader’ is at the helm – and that’s you!!
In our monthly session . . .
We talked about what goals really are and how few people really have them – and why. We also reviewed some of the many benefits associated with goal setting, how to set them and then how to reach them. I really wish we had about two more hours together to get into some of the ‘processes’ a little more deeply but that’s really what the ‘one-on-one’ sessions are really all about – helping you understand the application of the processes to who you are and to what you want to accomplish . . . and then how to turn around and help your people do the same.
Important!
The whole process of identifying and reaching important, life changing goals can seem somewhat complicated unless you have someone who can simplify the process for you and make it as easy as possible for you to get started and to get the ‘hang of it’. That’s what we’re here for, to help you get started and then to succeed! We already have a number of people who have followed up with us to schedule an opportunity for a private ‘one-on-one’ coaching session for that purpose. As a matter of fact, why don’t you send us an email and/or just give us a call and we’ll schedule a convenient time for us to walk you through the process of getting a few goals set up for yourself and how to get your team members headed in the same direction. Our contact information is listed below. Do it today while you’re thinking about it!
(This is a very valuable resource your company is making available to you – plan to take full advantage of it!!)
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Additional Resource Material!
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Communication
I have included an expanded version of page 6-7A for you to print, review and add to your student manual for future reference. It will outline for you the points that were discussed under each of the six listening skills that we covered. Not only can ‘you’ focus on getting better at each of these yourself but you can use the same information to help a team member or maybe even a friend or family member (teenager!) to become a better listener as well.
(You can request a copy of page 6-7A by clicking here.)
Goals
I have included page 6-18 for you to print, review and add to your student manual. It is our definition of what a goal actually is. There are a lot of ideas out there as to what goals are but in terms of how we are ‘wired up’ as human beings and what’s required if goals are to be properly set and then successfully reached – here’s the most accurate definition you’ll find. Think about it . . .
(You can request a copy of page 6-18 by clicking here.)
I’ve included an expanded version of page 6-19 for you to print, review and add to your student manual for future reference. This can be a very important page for you to familiarize yourself with because it’s tough to get very excited about anything you are not really ’sold’ on and this list will come in handy when it comes to you selling yourself or one of your team members or maybe even one of your teenagers on the benefits of setting meaningful goals. Take a look at the list and see what you think!
(You can request a copy of page 6-19 by clicking here.)
I have also included an expanded version of page 6-24 for you to print, review and add to your student manual for future reference. Remember that we have said on a number of occasions that ’success’ is the result of a number of factors coming together in just the ‘right way’ to produce the desired results. That’s particularly true when it comes to achieving personal and professional growth, and to accomplishing important goals in our life. We are creatures of ‘habit’ and winning and/or loosing in life has everything to do with the kinds of habits we choose to establish (knowingly or unknowingly) in our life.
(You can request a copy of page 6-24 by clicking here.)
In addition to just printing and adding this page to your manual, I would challenge you to review each new ‘habit’ on the list and ask yourself whether or not it represents your ‘present approach’ to life, and if it doesn’t, then begin making the appropriate changes immediately. One of the simplest but most strategically impacting things you can begin doing is reading this list ‘out loud’ to yourself every morning in the form of ‘first person’ statements. Example, simply put the word ‘I’ in front of each statement before you read it out loud and see what you think.
That simple exercise combined with reviewing each of your written goals each morning will make a tremendous difference in terms of your attitude, your focus and in your ability to reach all the important goals you have established for yourself and for your family!
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Additional Opportunity!
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There were a number of people who, at the end of the session, expressed an interest in being able to invest some additional time discussing the issue of setting and then reaching important goals, specifically as it relates to how to incorporate the ‘goal setting’ process into how they manage their people, in order to improve attitudes, increase motivation and achieve even better results through their people. That’s Exciting!
We would be pleased to schedule a convenient time to meetagain with you on an individual basis, or as a group, to answer any additional questions you might have and to discuss how to apply what we covered to the accomplishment of the goals you’ve set for your people.
Please email or contact us at the number listed below to schedule a convenient time for us to get together. There are no additional costs involved other than the costs associated with you taking no action!
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Four Keys to Goal Achievement!
Statistically, only 1 in 50 people will accomplish ’real success’ in more than only one main area in their life. For those who do tend to achieve much more than the average, it’s because they are ‘knowingly’ or even ‘unknowingly’ applying the following four keys to setting and reaching their goals.
Key #1
We have said in past sessions that positive change and the success it brings must start on the ‘inside’ and work its way outward.
Positive internal change begins with your self image. If you can not identify WITH the goal, it’s probably not going to be accomplished.
If you think of a goal and deep down believe, “That’s not me,” then guess what? It’s like driving a car with one foot on the gas and the other foot on the brakes. With that kind of ’self-defeatist’ self-talk, you won’t even make it out of the driveway and onto the road of life, much less succeed.
But when you can not only see yourself doing what is necessary and enjoying it, but you can also truly identify WITH every part of what ‘owning’ the accomplishment of your goal will mean to every part of your life, you are a thousand times more likely to stay focused and involved in it until the goal is finally successfully achieved.
When you think deep down, “I am (a great ______ ),” then your identity is now tied up in your success, and you are on your way to success.
Key #2
Review page 6-23 in your student manual (steps to achieving important goals) and pay particular attention to step #3. This is typically where a lot of people get side-tracked and often times will just sit down and quit.
When it comes to this particular step in the overall process, in addition to taking the appropriate steps to minimize the issue or issues involved, one of the most important steps for you to take is to literally ’shrink down’ the size of the obstacles or challenges - ’in your mind’.
Yes, the brain can (and often does) make tasks look big and quite impossible. And the brain can also make tasks look small and ridiculously easy as well. Same task!
When the challenge looks small and easy, confidence soars. This can make incredibly difficult tasks or challenges feel fun, which is an important key to accomplishing your goals. We can show you how to minimize the challenges involved in your mind when we get together in our individual coaching sessions.
Key #3
Seeing mistakes, setbacks, delays not as ‘problems’ but as inevitable and predictable steps that are just a normal part of working toward the accomplishment of any important goal. Truly, it’s all a matter of perspective.
High achievers in all fields are ‘prepared’ and ready for the so-called ‘problems’ that arise in the midst of any worthwhile endeavor and when they show up, they get ‘excited’ and then just solve them instead of becoming depressed and defeated. When you know what to expect and you are prepared – you’re able to function at your best and succeed. It kind of brings a whole new meaning to . . .
Proper Prior Preparation Prevents Pitiful Poor Performance!
Key #4
Just ‘knowing’ the benefits of reaching a particular goal is really not enough. They have to become a part of you. The benefits you associate with your goals really do have to be a true reflection of those things that you place the greatest degree of value on in one or more areas of your life. Then as you go to work on creating your written description of all the benefits associated with achieving a particular goal in your life, they will become ‘truly meaningful’ to you to the degree that you won’t be able to keep from moving in that direction.
Also, to achieve very difficult feats, you must be able to ’spit out’ the benefits in your sleep - backwards, forwards, upside down and inside out. The benefits have to have been internalized to the degree that they become a big part of your consciousness. This is accomplished by reviewing your goals and all the benefits associated with the accomplishment of your goals on a ‘daily basis’. We will talk more about how to do that correctly and systematically when we get together one-on-one.
Ultimately, you need to make the benefits incredibly attractive to you. You need to really ‘fall in love’ with the benefits. They will become the power source that will get your goals off the launching pad and will keep you in flight until each of your important goals are fully accomplished.
When the perception of the pleasure associated with the accomplishment of your goals outweighs the perception of the pain involved – you’ll head for the pleasure every time and win!
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Application Projects!!!!
Communication
Turn in your manual to page 6-10. You will see the application project page for the first segment on communication. This will be a pretty easy project to complete and will provide you with some very practical benefits in the process.
The application project is designed to reinforce the fact that each one of us can become much better listeners as the result of making the decision to become better at each one of the specific steps that we discussed in our session together.
Read the introduction at the top of the application project page and then review the six skills listed on page 6-7A and also the six steps listed on page 6-8. After reviewing these two pages, question one will ask you to choose and list the three areas that will represent the greatest opportunity for the improvement of your own skills.
Question two will ask you to think through the application of those specific skills or ‘aspects of communication’ that you will want to focus on and improve, and then to identify the ‘opportunities’ you will have to start ‘practicing’ your new skills.
The goal is to begin paying closer attention to how you typically communicate on a daily basis and to look for ways to ‘improve’ by applying what we learned in our session, and then to report back regarding the progress you will have made between now and when we meet next month.
Keep in mind that as you begin to become more aware of how communication typically takes place in your organization and you begin improving your skills, you will definitely want to get the members of your team involved in making the same kind of improvements you are!
Goals
Turn in your manual to page 6-27. You will see the application project page for the second segment on setting and reaching goals. This project may require a little more time to complete but the benefits will far outweigh the effort involved. As you review page 6-27, you can see that all you need to do is to ‘follow the directions’ and you will be able to complete the project. Pay particular attention to the ‘note’ at the bottom of the page – we’re here to help you succeed! Let’s look at a few of the pages together; (First take a moment to review page 6-18 again!)
My Values – Page 6-28
It has been suggested that you can’t hit a target you don’t have and that you won’t invest enough of yourself to succeed if the target is not something you care deeply about. The first step in the process of you setting your goals is to determine what’s really most important to you in each of the most important areas of your life. Begin by asking the question you see at the top of the page as many times as you may need to until you feel you are clear on what’s truly most important to you in each of the areas you see listed on the page. Then and only then are you ready to move on to the next step.
My One Year Goals – Page 6-29
Once you know what you place the greatest degree of value on in each of the areas listed on page 6-28, you then move on to the next step in the process which is on page 6-29, and you begin to ask yourself what goals will need to be set and reached in each area in order for me to be able to experience what I consider to be most important to me in each of those areas.
Goal Setting Strategy – Page 6-23
Once you have identified the specific goals you want to set and reach in each of the areas listed on page 6-29, you’re ready to begin thinking through the process of more fully identifying the specifics of your goals and the specific steps you will need to take to achieve each of them. That process is outlined for you on page 6-23.
This process will involve nine specific questions that you will want to answer where each of your goals are concerned. It will be as easy as following the prompts and answering the questions you see - and then writing down your answers on the form. Obviously, you will need to complete a separate form for each one of your goals.
By the time you will have worked your way through the complete process, you will have a pretty good understanding of what’s most important to you, the goals you will need to set and reach to be able to experience more of the things you place the greatest degree of value on in your life, and an understanding of what you will need to do to begin accomplishing each of your goals.
It’ll be a real eye-opening experience for you – you will have completed your application project – but it doesn’t stop there! The real objective is to engage you in the process of becoming more involved in your life and more excited about who you have the ability to become and what you have the ability to accomplish in and through your life.
We work with a lot of people in these areas as a part of the success coaching process that we make available through the Leadership Institute, and we are happy to work with you as well to help you understand, think through, properly set and then reach your goals. It’s included as a part of the leadership development process you are going through so please do feel free to email or give us a call if you want to schedule some personal one-on-one success coaching.
We want to make sure you receive the maximum benefit possible from not only the application projects referenced above but from everything you’re learning as you progress through the process with us.
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Great Idea!!
Why don’t you go ahead and follow through and get started on your application projects now while the content and all the concepts are still fresh in your mind?
As a matter of fact, once you get started, you’ll really enjoy thinking through the processes and succeeding! Your people will enjoy it too!
Remember:
Please feel free to email or you can give us a call if you would like any personal assistance and/or coaching when it comes to completing your application projects this month.
You can call or email! (See Below!)
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Coaching!
Let me remind you once again to plan to take full advantage of your opportunity for individual ‘on-site’ coaching in any of the areas that pertain to the application of the concepts, principles and processes we cover in our monthly sessions. In addition, we are always happy to assist you in any areas pertaining to everyday ‘people’ issues. We can assist you by phone or at your location. Just email or give us a call and we will go to work on scheduling a convenient time for us to get together.
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Next Month . . .
Make sure you join us again next month as we take an interesting look at the ‘mechanics’ of time management and organization and how to create an extra two to three hours each day thereby making it possible for you to accomplish more in less time – and leave at the end of each workday feeling like to really have accomplished something that day.
We’re also going to focus on how to delegate effectively. You might be surprised to discover how few managers are really willing to delegate and how many mistakes are typically made when they do. You will be excited to learn what delegation really is and how simple it is to do it effectively when you understand the process we will cover in our session together next month.
Two very valuable sessions you will not want to miss. I’ll tell you more about what to expect in the July email newsletter & monthly reminder.
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One Last Thing . . .
If you get a minute, Click here and give us some feedback regarding this month’s session. We always appreciate and enjoy hearing back from you.
Have a great month and remember . . . .
“The will to win is worth nothing
unless you have the will to prepare.”
Sincerely,
Jim
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Leadership works best when people are equipped to manage themselves. When that happens, everyone on your team is then working proactively.
Everyone is participating in leadership. You create this type of environment through win-win agreements which stem from quality relationships built primarily on mutual respect and trust instead of on authority alone.
— Jim Abbondante
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Contact Information . . .
President, Director of Training
Direct Line: (817) 304-2225
Leadership Institute
Main Number: (817) 405-0012
Student Services Number: 1-800-955-0109
(Personal and/or Executive Coaching, Misc. Needs, etc.)
E-Mail: Leadership.Team@LeadershipInstituteUSA.com
Web-Site: www.LeadershipInstituteUSA.com
